October 14, 2004

A Placenta Helper Moment

My only comment on the debate: the questions were terrible. They should just eliminate the middleman and let Sally Jessy Raphael moderate next time, rather than just feeding her questions to a doddering, tooth-sucking, half-wit "newsman." Or Montel Williams. He would have been good.

The worst was the last one about "strong women." My wife, who is British and still occasionally thunderstruck by the ways of her adopted land, had a hard time believing it when someone told her that in California certain hippie-ish gals will try to become more earthy and ecological by eating their own placentas after giving birth. I clearly remember her repulsed expression, the look that says "I doubt I'll be able to keep my food down from this point forward," upon hearing this - it lasted several weeks. She finally got over it and her face returned to normal. But Bob Jessy Donahue asked the strong woman question, and there it was again. Clearly, a Placenta Helper Moment.

Then we scanned the post-debate TV pundit-a-thon and everyone was saying things like "wow, all the women are really gonna love this!" and "way to close the Gender Gap!" Mort Kondracke was ecstatic. Others were solemnly analyzing who "did better" in the all-important Say Something Cloying contest. I don't know who did better - the whole thing made me feel faintly nauseous.

I admit, the chicks I know may not be all that representative, but I can't imagine any of them going all Mort Kondracke over this. I'm sure all of their eyes rolled practically all the way out of all their tiny little sockets. As for me, I'd have been quite happy to endorse the guy brave enough to give the Right Response to this asinine question, that response being "what are you, high?" Sadly, neither of them measure up.

Posted by Dr. Frank at October 14, 2004 03:17 PM | TrackBack

Why is it that when talking about these debates, all people do is speculate about what other poeple will think? My personal assessment was that so much of what both candidates said was intentionally misleading that it made me depressed (see figures regarding health care given by both sides). The way to win an election seems to be by tricking stupid people into voting for you. I guess there is probably a correlation between being undecided at this point, and not being intelligent/educated enough to see these men purposely present delusive reasoning.

Posted by: josh at October 14, 2004 03:43 PM

By the way that first sentence is not a shot at Dr. Frank, just an observation.

Posted by: josh at October 14, 2004 03:44 PM

This seems germane to josh's point.

As for Dr. Frank, maybe he just feels *intimidated* by Strong Women! ;) (I know I do)

Posted by: Blixa at October 14, 2004 04:40 PM

Oops - no html?

"This" = this:


Posted by: Blixa at October 14, 2004 04:41 PM

Wait wait wait... Frank, my wife and I have the same discussions (she's British too), but in terms of placenta eating, Britain's got at least as much to answer for: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/101944.stm

At least we don't televise it and call it a cooking show!

Posted by: marc w. at October 14, 2004 04:41 PM

I had a cat one time, that I observed do this, but for humans to do it to become more "Earthly". You Terrans are sure a strange lot. There's only one thing I can say to the question of "strong women" and I pose it with a question. "Institutionalized Misogyny"?

Posted by: Zaphod (I'm gonna wretch too) Beeblebrox at October 14, 2004 06:24 PM

You should have heard the French-accented groan down here....

Posted by: Matt Welch at October 14, 2004 09:08 PM

placenta eating? now i'm a radical feminist and even i have to say ew. i mean women of course can choose to eat placenta if they want. but still ew.

Posted by: r a e d y at October 14, 2004 09:22 PM

Ew is right, but I do remember seeing those gross videos in preparation for the blessed event and thinking- wow, that thing looks like a flank steak.

So I'm wondering, Frank, if you know, do these people consume their own placentas raw? I don't know why but cooking the thing seems even more gross, in a way. Then again, maybe if you made like a chicken fried placenta it might not be so terrible. I bet you could substitute it in some chopped liver & it would be pretty decent on toast.

Posted by: div at October 14, 2004 11:14 PM

Pardon me while I crawl out from under my rock, but I have never heard of a girl eating placenta or afterbirth. Ew indeed.

Posted by: Rich at October 15, 2004 01:00 AM

I can't be certain because I'm not actually a politician but I'm pretty sure that "tricking stupid people into voting for you" IS how the election process works...not because everyone who votes is stupid but because so many people aren't willing to be informed about much of anything around them so it really isn't a possibility.

EWE! On the placenta thing too, but I can't help but wonder (because most of the people I know out on the east coast who are "earth consious" are vegitarians too) if these "earthy gals" were vegatarians and if they were unbothered by the canibalism because that is the only sort of flesh they have consumed in ages...on the other hand, we are all really just monkeys and monkeys eat eachother's body lice so...

Posted by: Rude Girl Terry at October 15, 2004 01:29 AM

Hmmm. Can't agree on the questions...yes a couple were feel good, but more than once my wife and I were in disbelief that Scheiffer (sp?) was asking a loaded, baggage-heavy question.

Posted by: TroyM at October 15, 2004 01:41 AM

scheiffer should pronounce his name correctly.

as for placenta eating... sounds like a vegan thing. i guess some people will go insane trying to make a point and at the same time reconstruct some prehistoric myth for their lost culture. i wonder how many women in berkeley who drive volvo station wagons would eat their placentas.

Posted by: kendra at October 15, 2004 06:12 AM

That debate was indeed nauseously lame.

Is it just me or does Scheiffer always talk like he's reading a book to children? Kinda like ol' Bill Schneider (CNN's, not Pinhead Gunpowder's).

Oh, and... ew.

Posted by: Matt Riggle at October 15, 2004 08:08 AM

well, until now i have writhed in disgust at the looks people give me when i say i am from oklahoma. i've had new york scowls that say "oh you poor backward boy," san francisco sneers that wonder if i even have running water and the list goes on. and in the past, I have always prided myself with a firm sense of having a pretty good grasp on whats going on in the world. i'm out to prove that midwestern landlocked americans can be saavy to up to date living, thinking and cultural ideas. however, dr. frank has now shattered my idealistic little pipe dream. i now stand a sheltered, redneck okie utterly shocked and replulsed by the thought of a woman chewing at her afterbirth like an animal. i am not modern and did not know of such things, and hang my head in shame. i can't stop thinking of my beagle, beezus when i was 12 years old giving birth. she chewed, bit and licked at the purple birth sacks until a tiny new beagle finally appeared. i can just imagine pamela anderson lying back with new age tree songs playing softly while she chants kabahla prayers and slurps down her childs fresh placenta. well, i'm now off to slop the hogs, pick the corn, and dirve the truck down to the local klan meetin.


Posted by: luke black at October 15, 2004 08:44 AM

wait, was it not "pc" to make a klan reference in a highly sarcastic, obviously joking manner? yes, i'm sure it wasn't, but political correctness is just a fancy way to say censorship and it is ruining our country. but if anyone is offended by lack of "pcness" i don't care. if anyone took the klan thing seioursly, it was a dramatic, satyrical jab at the average oklahoman stereotype. i'm not racist. except for midgets, oh, wait, i mean "little people," i hate them.


Posted by: luke black at October 15, 2004 08:50 AM

Sounds like a waste of perfectly good stem cells.

Posted by: Lauren Godzilla at October 15, 2004 02:14 PM

how come this has absolutly nothing to do with what a placenta is !!!!??????!!!!

Posted by: jade at December 8, 2004 04:34 PM
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