SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH OSAMA
Not really. That is, I don't think the actual Loony bin Laden was in Hyde Park today, though there were several guys with similar sartorial ideas. But after the news agent's hint about a dark presence haunting Golders Green, and since the Distinctive Voice on the Tora Bora walkie-talkie is still at large and has lived to talk another day, I've been keeping my eyes open...
Great Britain doesn't have a formal bill of rights like we do. The closest thing they have to our first amendment's guarantee of freedom of speech is Speaker's Corner, in Hyde Park. Every Sunday, for all those standing on a little piece of pavement on the edge of the park, the ambiguity surrounding the Englishman's general free speech situation is temporarily suspended. Anybody who wants to can climb up on a step-ladder and say (or, more accurately, shout) anything he or she (or, let's be honest, it) wants.
It's a peculiar system, since the practicality of exercising this right varies according to the clemency of the weather. Attendance, both of speakers and of spectators, was definitely down today owing to the cold temperature. My estimate is six speakers with clusters of listeners varying from three to twenty-five apiece, not counting the couple of speakers with no audience at all. The fact that they continue to holler into the void under such inhospitable conditions is a testament to the sturdiness of the English spirit. It may also, perhaps, be a testament to the lack of imagination of the English nutter. One of the audience-deprived speakers was actually holding a sign that said "repent"-- solid advice, no doubt, and a trusty film and television standby, but clearly a message that no longer cuts it with today's sophisticated free speech crowd.
The most popular speaker by far, today as on practically every other day I've been there, is a man known as the "sex speaker." (He's been at it for years-- I first saw him about five years ago.) He does indeed talk about sex, with a bit of topical commentary thrown in here and there. But the focus of his "act" is primarily on snappy comebacks in response to a steady flow of heckling.
The Heckler: Mr. Speaker, Mr. Speaker! I must have the answer! Is it true you like the little boys? I hear you like the little boys!The Sex Speaker: No, not at all, not at all. I used to be gay. But then I saw you and changed my mind.
It goes on like that for hours, and he's often genuinely funny, certainly a lot more fun than the "Christian Atheists" guy (who is also always there and whom I have yet to see attract a single listener.)
It's all part of the rich tapestry of their island story. Yet, in fact, very few actual Britons are moved to participate. Over half of the spectators appear to have been American tourists, perhaps drawn there (as I was) by an inborn desire to breathe the air of freedom, particularly when it involves sex in some way.
One final point on Speaker's Corner: the atmosphere, as well as a great deal of the content, evokes the prophet scene in Monty Python's Life of Brian, which I'm sure is intentional (and perhaps even intentional on both sides...) Most Americans assume that Monty Python's Flying Circus is satire; it takes a couple of visits before you realize it's a documentary.
Posted by Dr. Frank at December 16, 2001 04:41 PM | TrackBack