I'm starting to understand, just a bit, why people with jobs end up blogging so often. Whether or not you have anything particular to say about whatever may or may not be going on, and whatever job you might have, typing stuff into the little "entry body" box is for some reason far more compelling than any of the stuff you're required to do. Just think how productive our economy might be if all those missing blog-hours were channeled into activities that actually produce something. Stiff penalties for slackers; mandatory ISP monitoring; burden of proof on the accused to demonstrate what they were doing instead. Then we could all get jobs as internet narcs. Wouldn't work? How do you know till you try?
Like right now? What I really should be doing is arranging all these tiny slips of paper into chronological order and sorting them by type, adding them up, subtracting the resulting running total from another sum derived from adding up a different wad of little slips of paper, trying to figure out why the number is so, uh, negative, projecting possible ways to make it end up less negative at some future point, and sobbing helplessly in the corner while my bandmates stand around saying "he's crying again. What the hell is wrong with that guy?"
I'm kidding, really. I haven't reached the sobbing in the corner stage. Give me time, though. My point is, I really should be "doing the accounting" right now. But I'm not.
Yet it should be noted that you can learn how to do your "job" better just by standing around in a crowded nightclub, PBR in hand. That's my preferred method, anyway. The other night in Sacramento, for example, I got some tax advice from a trio of young, fashionably-attired female tax accountants. I'm not even kidding about that; it's really true. Now and then, one or two of them would take a break from their risque girl on girl disco dancing, wander over, and offer me some valuable tax tips. There was even some accountant humor thrown in: did you know that gambling winnings are tax deductible? (pause; then, spiritedly and in unison) but only to offset gambling losses! I'm keeping it in mind.
Posted by Dr. Frank at February 9, 2004 05:53 PM | TrackBackFunny you should write about money. Right now I'm fretting over how many Canadain dollars I'll need to convert to US for my trip to the show in MN. $250.00 Candian is only worth about $180.00 US. *sobs*
Posted by: Lynn at February 9, 2004 06:02 PMwhat! i'm productive, frank! i work at a hotel and book hotel rooms for borderline independent rock folk in my spare time from blogging, which i do in my spare time from listening to music, which i do in my spare time from smoke breaks, which i do in my spare time from dr pepper runs, which i do in my spare time from actually working. don't even THINK about selling me out, frank!
Posted by: resident jason at February 9, 2004 06:15 PMI'm productive aside from my break during the day to read Frank's latest ramblings. Now it's back to internet porn, whoops, I meant flowcharts.
Posted by: jordan at February 9, 2004 06:28 PMJust to let you all know, since I'm in IT. Your place of business already can track your internet surfing by consulting the proxy-log on the server. In layman's terms, it means that the internet server at your workplace keeps track of everybody's surfing and if they wanted to check on you, they can. The easiest way to semi-circumvent this is to delete the cache from your local machine and disavow any knowledge if confronted about it. That or you could pay to go through one of those anonymous ip surfing sites and the only thing it'd show you going to is the anonymous relayer's site. Here is one, if you wish to sample: http://www.anonymizer.com/
Posted by: Channon at February 9, 2004 06:43 PMThis is why it's nice to have a job developing Web Pages. Right now I'm just analyzing the exquisite design and typography of doktorfrank.com for possible use in a future client's page.
Trebuchet, interesting. (See, Mr. Boss-man?)
Posted by: Dave Bug at February 9, 2004 07:47 PMbingo. it's the age-old question: "what did people do at office jobs before the internet??!" perish the thought! but i doubt they worked more. i'm sure they just took longer lunches.
until my job as survey researcher in a hospital becomes more interesting than amusing myself with stuff like "Tribute to The Jam" week on my website than those surveys are just gonna have to sit a little longer.
Posted by: krucoff at February 9, 2004 08:57 PM
Most of the jobs I've had were defined by the internet. I use that line of reasoning to not feel guilty about spending so much time online. The next level of fallback is to claim that the net (or Dr. Frank, or hotbuns.com, or whatever) is your muse, and as an artist, you must be inspired to complete your work. I'd buy it.
i remember one time i was caught being unproductive on the internet.
that was an unpleasant experience to say the
least. assuredly i am now at least a little more
on task even when i really have to look for tasks.
beth
Posted by: just me at February 10, 2004 12:56 AMI am willing to bet you that your average weblogger who blogs now and then from work would not be particularly more productive in a given week if you took their access to it away. Oh certainly, the real slackers would do better, but I'm willing to imagine that youre average busy blogger is actually someone who fidgets and daydreams a lot and has a hard time concentrating for long periods on one subject anyway, and needs a creative outlet.
Posted by: Dean Esmay at February 11, 2004 11:33 AMI think you got the tax advice wrong. the losses are deductable to offset winnings.
That's one reason it's important to have one of those player cards that the casinos use to track you. Makes it easy to figure out.
Posted by: Kevin at February 16, 2004 12:34 PMYes, Kevin. I believe therein lay the humor.
Posted by: Dr. Frank at February 16, 2004 03:43 PM